How do I know I can trust you?

54% of lies can be accurately spotted.

Extroverts lie more than introverts.

At least of 82% of lies go undetected.

You can increase to 90% accuracy

Trust is our tie to people and life. To trust someone means to put faith, belief, hope and even reliance on them. To trust is the blood that flows through out veins; it is an intrinsic part of human nature. If, we were to stop believing in this, we most likely not be able to function properly or even efficiently. It is a fact that people lie on a regular basis. The percentage is high as 91% of us lie in both personal and work lives. If this is the case, how do we move forward and create a stronger self, increased self-esteem and love for ourselves wholly. It is time to become empowered and create a strong foundation of the self to be able to create long-lasting relationships in all areas of our lives.

Difficult conversations are difficult because we are assuming a negative end before it has begun. Imagine if you can change this and create a stronger self because really the conversation was not as difficult as you imagined.

Here are some tips in carrying this out:

1. Organise a meeting in a neutral place, if required

2. Be prepared with factual information, providing evidence where necessary (keep a log)

3. Keep your tone neutral, listen and give them the space to talk

4. Take away the information they present you

5. Request full exposure on the subject or topic you wish to discuss

6. Listen to the warning signs

7. Their reaction will indicate whether you are justified in your concerns

8. Minute the meeting if required

9. Try to create a resolution for both parties in mind

10. Take legal action if required or research legalities involved if required

There are many difficult topics that we as individuals are required to carry out. It is how we carry them out, create authentic relationships and forging a bond with another; which will indicate the truth in the matter. It is integral to understand that if something does not feel right, then there is a 90% chance that they are lying. If you can create a strong self and real self love, then even when you carry out difficult conversations, they will no longer be difficult anymore.

Here are ten signs of how someone is lying:

1. There will be a change in their voice. This can be an increase or decrease in their pitch or speed of the words that they are using.

2. They will stop moving and become completely still

3. Their body expressions will not match their words. Pay close attention to their hands, breath, colour of their skin and their eye movements

4. The language they use will be less personal to distance themselves from the person or object

5. Direction of their eyes – movement of the eyes to the top left hand side.

6. Covering their eyes or mouth to hide the truth from you and themselves

7. Pausing. Long pauses helps them create a narrative

8. Pointing to something or a person or you – pointing is a deflection away from the truth. This takes the focus off of them

It is time to break the barriers and create steps towards smarter relationships that will benefit everyone involved. Take the leap of faith in yourself and your journey will only become more fruitful.


Defend your space!

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